Rindu

Hari ini awan mendung dan kelabu. Semendung hatiku tanpa hadirmu. Sekelabu warna wajahku tanpa bisik suaramu. Lelah aku menanti kehadiranmu.. dalam tidur, dalam jaga. Dalam angan dan sedarku menyebut namamu di hujung lidah dan dilubuk hati. Rawan dan gundah jiwa raga mengenangmu seorang. Mengapa masih tak kunjung datang. Jenguklah sekejap hanya untuk menghambat rindu di kamar hati.

Sungguh aku rindu renunganmu. Merenungku tak berkelip. Menjengah segenap inci wajahku. Mengusap lembut hanya dengan lirikan. Lemas aku dalam bening matamu.

Juga aku rindu suaramu. Mesra menyentuh gegendang telingaku dengan ucapan-ucapan rindu penuh syahdu. Mendendang irama ceria sepanjang siang hingga malam. Hanyut aku dalam kisah kasih yang kau lagukan.

Tapi kini.. belum juga kau datang. Belum juga kau hambat rindu yang kian menggunung. Belum juga kau dendangkan aku dengan lagu kasih mesra. Belum lagi aku terpana dalam bening matamu. Belum lagi hangat pipiku dibelai hela nafasmu.

Kemarilah sayang..tawarkan kerinduan yang menggigit. Usah biar hanya sedikit kecewa merobohkan tugu rindu yang baru terbina. Kukuhkan hati, biar cinta terus membara. Kembalikan kegembiraan ku itu. Kembalikan keceriaan diwajahku.

Emotions

Aku bosan ke? Aku rasa macam aku ok jer.. kadang2 kuar dengan kawan2, dengan ex-ofismates, member2 chatting.. Time keje banyak memang aku tak sempat nak tanya kabar pun la.. tapiiii kalau time takde keje sangat, aku hang out je dengan memember..

So.. aku bosan ke? Weekend aku dengan princess.. Jalan2, ice-skating..bowling..movie going.. takde pulak masa yang tak terisi.. Pegi shopping, or window shopping..

So.. aku bosan ke wei??? Hmmm... rasanyer tak kut.. lonely maybe..

Aku lonely ke? Hmmm... malam2 tido peluk bantal sorang2... kadang2 bantal peluk aku sebab aku dah tersepak dia jatuh katil.. Hahahah!! Aku lonely ke? Jalan2 tengok kapel peluk2, pegang2 tangan.. aku telan air liur je la..

Hadeyyyyy... lonely nyerrr aku!!

Inkheart

Just came back from GSC Mid Valley to catch a movie. Was quite nice and entertaining for kids and adults alike. The story was about Mo, who has this gift of making stories came into life when he read it out loud. But when the charater came to life, he or she will be replaced by someone from the real life. So, Mo lost his wife who were absorbed into the book.

I had to queue for half an hour before I reached the counter. Never thought that I would be that patient to queue away, but that's what I did. I wonder how all the youngsters or movie goer could actually do that everytime they went for a movie. Can't be that they booked in advance all the time right? Cos I tried to do that but I can't and were asked to go to the counter.. Sighhh.. Or did I do it the wrong way? Hehehe.. yeah I'm an old woman.

Well.. you all should go watch a movie sometimes too. Like when you don't know what to do.. or run out of things to do.. or just to kill the time while waiting for someone.. or for whatever reason.

Ok for now.. catch u up later.. ;)

Am I really sad or is it just hormone change??

I'm feeling quite down these few days.. been this way for quite a while.

Am I really sad? Or mad? Somehow I do feel painful in my chest. Like I'm about to burst or to explode. Like I'm keeping something inside. Don't know what is it or how to let it ease away. Or do I know the root cause of it?

Or could it be just hormone change. I'm counting my days until the girl 's best friend pay me a visit. You know.. the monthly visitor. Never late.. hope it won't be until the day i take my vow.. hehehe...;)

Well.. maybe I'm just tired.. and I'm sleepy.. Maybe i should just go to sleep. And start a new day tomorrow..owhh it's already a new day!!

Starting a new life..

I just came back from meeting a long time acquaintance. Wouldn't call him a friend since we were never that close, but we used to have a history back then. It quite taken me aback that he said thanks that I agreed to see him today. Well.. that is almost like an apology for things that has happened before, though for me I never want to remember all the bad memories. For me, everybody makes mistake including me. And if the other party started contacting me again after a long while, I have no problem with that. Generous huh? Hehehe.. Such a good soul that's me ;).

Reason that I went to see him was actually to let him test my cake. Though I doubt he would promote it for me, but who knows.. He might feel obligated to do so.. Huehuehue.. And if that thing ever happen, who will benefit from it other than me?

Well, ok.. We met and had a chit chat for a while. I asked him how has he been doing and so he asked me the same thing. Then, he said that he wanted to start a new life. Wanting to forget what has just recently passed. He broke up with his fiance. Not sure who dump who but the hurt must be unbearable if he wanted to went away just to heal up. I wouldn't agree though for someone to leave the country just to run away from someone. For me, it's like you are letting someone to control your life when he or she doesn't even want you! Otherwise, you'll never break up right? And why ever do you want to leave all your commitment, your beloved family, kids, friends, business, etc just for his or her sake. Gosh!! Personally, I would prefer to ask the other party to leave instead of me!

Yup.. I know I have no right whatsoever to tell someone to do this or that. That would make me trying to control someone else's life when I don't have the right to do so. This is just how I feel. Anyway it's my blog and I have THE right to write my personal view on this issue right?

So tell me, what do you all think about this? Feel free to write me your personal view.

My first blog

It's still early on Tuesday morning on the 27th January, 2009.. 2nd day of CNY holiday. Or is it 2nd? Considering the two buddies (Saturday and Sunday), it is more appropriate to say it's the 4th day of the CNY holiday.. or is it? Well.. does is matter anyway? 1st, 2nd, 3rd or 4th? It is holiday dude!

However, this being the 1st blog I wrote here.. that should count for something though.. Hehehe.. I mean.. me?? Writing?? Have always been my dream.. well, one of the many actually.

I used to write when I was in school.. Poems, short stories, articles. You know, that stuff. And had once in a while got it published. And I like to read too.. the many stories written by the many writers and sometimes bloggers. Now that I have the whole time the world in me own hands (I have just quit my job actually.. not really just, been two weeks already and am enjoying it heartily), I figure why not start doing it again. I mean I love doing it, and I don't have much to do otherwise, besides baking cakes. Yerp, I bake cakes as a living nowadays ;). Just started too.. like re-writing. Only different, I never bake before..hehehe..

Right, back to my dream of writing.. I have always wanted to write a novel. Love stories maybe..but am always stuck for first few words. Always, always, always. How do people start writing novels? Should I write in past tense? Or present? Should I write it as in I am the person in the novel? I mean "me"ing the character? Or "she"ing it. You know what I mean? And how does the heroin and the hero meet? And should I write light and easy love story or the heavy stuff? I don't mean "that" heavy heavy.. I mean maybe they are professionals in love instead of the schoolers or college goers.

Yeah.. I think I should just write what I feel like writing and then re-visit the written stuff. See whether that makes sense or not. And adjust as appropriate. Hey..am I giving too much away?? Hahaha.. Too much? or nothing at all.

So dear friends.. Please, please,please support me blog and read it always. I will continue updating the progress of my upcoming novel, huhuhu... Don't you ever doubt it honey. That would come someday.

Okay dude!! Till later.. maybe I'll write again today!